Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
well most of my day revolves around power hour
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
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