We won't sleep together?
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Randomize
