And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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