Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
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