If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
