i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Randomize
