Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
