First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize