What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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