Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
