Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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