so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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