I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Randomize
