The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Randomize
