Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
But theres a keg here and me gusta
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize
