if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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