OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
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