i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
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