Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize