I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
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