just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
