it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
