booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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