hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
