Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
