Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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