lets start a swedish sibling band together
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
sex in a hospital.. check
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
