i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
