none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Randomize
