scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Randomize
