Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize