Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
