We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
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