Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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