i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I got inside last night via doggy door
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Can you repeat that, but with context?
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize
