I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I will pee on everything he values.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
be right there i have to get my cape
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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