and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I currently don't understand fingers.
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