Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Soap is not a condiment
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
