I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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