Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize
