God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
