you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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