i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize