p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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