I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
