Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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