I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
