Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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