It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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