she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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